Dear Good Men: Thank You for Speaking Up About Abortion — Signed, a Grateful Woman
We’ve all heard the line: “No uterus, no opinion.” But does it actually make sense? Is it really true?
Essentially, this argument states that your opinion does not matter if you have not had lived experience. Does this argument truly stand for every area of society? Would society say that the only people that could say that school shootings are wrong as those that have personally been affected by a shooting? Of course not! It is common knowledge that school shootings are wrong whether one has been personally affected by it or not. It is wrong because taking the lives of innocent human beings is always unjust. In addition, isn’t that sexist to say men should not have an opinion on abortion because they do not have a uterus?1
One may ask themselves, why are men condemned for having an opinion on abortion? Why are men pushed aside and portrayed as having no right in the involvement of the decision making of what happens to the child that he has fathered? Perhaps it is because men hold, the most power. Perhaps it is because the father holds a significant impact on whether the woman has an abortion or not.2 It is not Sabrina Carpenter, or even the opinion of her parents, that matters the most. When the father of the baby steps up and says, “I will take care of you and our baby no matter what happens.” Or he says, “I am here for you, and I am willing to fight for this new life that we have made together,” abortion decreases dramatically.3
The evidence is clear, abortion and fatherlessness are interrelated if one looks at the statistics: 4
Eighty seven percent of abortions are obtained by unmarried women.5 Six in ten women who abort are already raising a child.6 The United States has the largest rate of children living in single parent households that is, almost a quarter, twenty-three percent, of children under the age of eighteen live with one parent.7 That is three times more likely than anywhere else in the world. Eighty percent of those single parent homes are led by women.8
Where are the fathers in these equations? Oh right, they were told, “it’s just a women’s issue.” “Her body her choice.” “It’s a discussion between her and her doctor.” Men have no right to utter a single thought concerning what happens. This perspective dispirits men from stepping up, even if they have the desire to protect and provide for their unborn child. They stay silent for society has told them so.9
If abortion does not cater to men that want to step up for their child that they helped create, then who does it serve? Of course, it would serve men who want to have leisurely sex with women and have no responsibilities in taking care of their own child.10 If one scans history and sees who has championed abortion, one can see that abortion truly was set to serve men. In America, the people championing Roe vs. Wade were men. Those advocating for Planned Parent and platformed by the abortion lobby were also men. Advocated by men such as Hugh Hefner, Harvey Weinstein and Bill Clinton. Were these admirable men who advocated for the dignity of women and children to be upheld? 11
The reality is, we have been lied to. Men not only have a right, but they have the responsibility to protect the lives of unborn children from murder. Murder through exsanguination, lethal injections, or starvation should be unconceivable in a developed country. Yet this is considered health care? What a lie.12
Women have also been lied to. They have been told that it is impowering to make decisions single-handedly; they can have it all. Men are just an accessory. No, we need men. We need strong, brave, empathetic men. Men are so important and are an integral part of society. To all the men out there, thank you. To all fathers and men that stand against societal norms and fight for unborn children, thank you. To all unplanned fathers, who just learned that their girlfriend or one night stand is now pregnant, your unborn child needs you. Pick up the phone and say that “I will help provide and protect for the new life that I helped to create.”
We need to confront unexpected pregnancies with compassion, rather than condemnation.
The question is what are we going to do about it?
Fathers: As mentioned above, have the courage and empathy to step up and say, “I am here for you and for our child no matter what.” Try to understand the world from the mother’s perspective.
Mothers: Allow your man to step up. With humility, dignity and grace.
Everyone: First off, there needs to be a cultural shift where every life is considered to have great value. However, this will take time. Before this happens, there are steps that we can take.
a.) We can value ourselves. Do not let others treat you less than the sons and daughters of a great King.
b.) We ourselves can value those that may be seen as less in society. Value them as someone that has a lot to contribute. Let’s be real, the average person with Down syndrome can teach every one of us a lot about love; a lot about what it means to love and be loved.
c.) Value the roles that men and women have in our society. Each role is equally important and vital to the health of our human family.
Let us stand boldly, let the cross be our lighthouse of truth, guiding sailors safely to shore in this tsunami of lies.
Dear all good men, thank you.
Photo credit: Shutterstock.com
[1] Nick Freitas, “Should Men Have A Say on Abortion?” Live Action, February 26, 2025. Video, 0.29.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hPDzEpDUDds.
[2] https://lifechoices.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/04/CareNet-research_abortion-in-church-1.pdf
[3] Nick Freitas, “Should Men Have A Say on Abortion?” Live Action, February 26, 2025. Video, 3:10- 3:45.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hPDzEpDUDds.
[4] Nick Freitas, “Should Men Have A Say on Abortion?” Live Action, February 26, 2025. Video, 3:45-3:55. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hPDzEpDUDds.
[5] Katherine Kortsmit, Antoinette T. Nguyen, Michele G. Mande, Lisa M. Hollier, Stephanie Ramer, Jessica Rodenhizer, and Maura K. Whiteman. “Abortion Surveillance- United States, 2021” Surveillance Summaries (November 24, 2023): 72(9);1–29. https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/volumes/72/ss/ss7209a1.htm
[6] Katherine Kortsmit, Antoinette T. Nguyen, Michele G. Mande, Lisa M. Hollier, Stephanie Ramer, Jessica Rodenhizer, and Maura K. Whiteman. “Abortion Surveillance- United States, 2021.”
[7] “Religion and Living Arrangements Around the World,” Pew Research Center (December 12, 2019). https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/2019/12/12/religion-and-living-arrangements-around-the-world/
[8] “Religion and Living Arrangements Around the World.”
[9] Nick Freitas, “Should Men Have A Say on Abortion?” Live Action, February 26, 2025. Video, 3:58- 4:14. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hPDzEpDUDds.
[10] Nick Freitas, “Should Men Have A Say on Abortion?” Live Action, February 26, 2025. Video, 1:48- 2:25.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hPDzEpDUDds.
[11] Nick Freitas, “Should Men Have A Say on Abortion?”148-2:25.
[12] Nick Freitas, “Should Men Have A Say on Abortion?” Live Action, February 26, 2025. Video, 1:00 – 1:40. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hPDzEpDUDds.